Gaudy Gum Chewing: The WORST!KIND Quick Guide to Pet Peeves
Posted by Jaesen Keith on
Gum chewing. It's a divisive topic that's sure to get people talking - or, more accurately, squirming. Some people love it - the satisfying snap of the gum, the refreshing burst of flavor, the satisfaction of keeping their mouths busy. Others despise it - the incessant popping, the smacking, the sight of someone pulling and twirling their gum like a mad scientist. It's a clash of the gum titans, and we're here to vent our frustrations. So sit back, relax, and prepare to be either grossed out by the WORST!KIND world of gaudy gum chewing.
For those who don't suffer from misophonia, there's nothing quite as irritating as a gaudy gum chewer. You know the type: the ones who pop, suck, and snap their gum with reckless abandon. They're like a one-person marching band, only instead of a snare drum, they've got a mouthful of gum.
And then there's the worst of the worst: the gum pullers. These are the people who take their gum out of their mouth and then start stretching it and twirling it around their fingers like it's some sort of circus act. It's enough to make you lose your lunch.
If you're a gaudy gum chewer, it's time to recognize that your behavior is not only irritating but also disgusting. Nobody wants to watch you pull your gum out of your mouth and play with it like it's a piece of silly putty. And nobody wants to hear the incessant popping and smacking of your gum.
So, what can you do if you're a gaudy gum chewer? First and foremost, be
aware of your behavior. Recognize that the people around you might not appreciate the sound of you popping and smacking your gum. And for the love of all that is holy, keep your fingers out of your mouth!
If you absolutely must chew gum, do so quietly and discreetly. Try not to make a spectacle of yourself. And if you're really feeling the need to stretch and twirl your gum, take a break and do it in private. Nobody wants to see that.
To sum it all up, gaudy gum chewers, please be aware of your behavior. Nobody wants to be subjected to the sound of your incessant popping and smacking, and nobody wants to watch you play with your gum like it's a piece of string. Be respectful of those around you and keep your gum chewing to a minimum. And if you really can't control yourself, invest in a pack of mints instead. Your colleagues and friends will thank you for it.